Two bugs flew into my eyes at the same time and I couldn't get them out

Well, that was a pretty long title but it is there for a reason. This is in response to Dan's post on the passion. Not that I disagree with Dan no, actually I agree with everything he said but I was one of those people who got something in their eyes and they just wouldn't stop watering. Well actually I broke down, but I'm definately not ashamed to say so. Actually seeing as i don't remember Dan's blog exactly we will probably end up saying the same thing but in different ways.

Anywho, yeah the Passion was a very powerful movie. Duh. Everybody knows that, but I think the reason that I was brought to tears wasn't necessarily because I was sad that Jesus had to die. Which I was but I realized that he rose again and we should be joyful. But the thing about that movie was that it showed how far Jesus had to go in order to save me. Yes, before I get yelled at, I know we could read that in the Bible, and it is just as if not more powerful. But maybe it's because I'm an American and need to have a movie in order to see things clearly or it's because tv has ruined my imagination but this movie showed me the extreem brutality that was placed on Jesus. It showed me the physical side of crucifiction. And just to clarify from Dan's post, yes hundreds of people got crucified but after a Roman scourging (as they did in the movie) a prisoner was not supposed to survive, and therefore usually would not be crucified. Most of the time they would be like the two other prisoners being crucifed with Jesus. (Obviously they were in pain but, um, there were obvious differences between them and Jesus) So yes there were people who were crucified but the majority of those did not expereince the torture that Jesus went through. But that isn't even what made me cry so much as the reason behind the torture. It's not that I don't have joy and am not thankful for what Jesus did, but the fact that he had to do it made me cry. Really, that should have been me. That's where I broke down, the fact that an all powerful God who could melt the mountains like wax and create a world for us and create us had to not only die, not only be tortured but also be seperated from the Creator whom Jesus had loved with his whole heart, soul and strength. To be abandoned for me, wow. The Father turned His face away. It was my sin that held him there. In light of that, yes the joy that God did that for me is definately still there. But the definition of "not fair" was put up on that screen. So it wasn't so much that I was crying because I was sad that Jesus died. It is so much more that Jesus chose to die for me. Of course not that you had to cry or your a bad person if you didn't but a real sorrow in light of what Jesus did is appropriate. Not that that sorrow cancels out our joy, no, but for me that sorrow increased my joy because for me the understanding of the depths that Jesus went to helps me understand how much I was saved from. Glory to God in the highest for what he did for me. The blood He shed for me deserves deep sorrow and the highest joy at the same time.